derailing | sometimes these cuts are so much deeper than they seem

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!arts and lovecrafts

sometimes these cuts are so much deeper than they seem

[It's been a rough day. Sure, Ryuunosuke's been sleeping through most of it, but recovering from a massive shoulder injury takes a lot out of you! Especially when you can't magically heal, goddammit Tsukiyama. Ryuunosuke doesn't regret it at all but he still feels sort of out of it after that conversation yesterday. Overall he feels better (ignoring the pain, of course) but for the majority of the day he's done nothing but sleep and lie in bed.

Ryuunosuke is actually up in the evening, but he's only sitting at the desk and writing. As usual, it's in Chinese and he pauses every so often to twirl the pen between his fingers while he thinks. He's never been the sort to keep notes or anything, but writing down his thoughts has actually helped him tremendously. It's a way to vent his feelings without having to talk to anyone. No wonder people keep diaries! He's got several sheets covered in writing around the time the nighttime announcements should go off, but he's not expecting Tsukiyama for a little while longer. Tsukiyama doesn't have anything to worry about from the other students after all, and Ryuunosuke doubts anyone would kill this early in the evening anyway.

The door is open a crack as usual, so Tsukiyama can let himself in should he want to!]

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[Well yeah, of course Tsukiyama wouldn't be threatened. He's the best ghoul!!]

No way, really? Who...?

[He's pretty sure he's seen everyone eat. Admittedly he doesn't pay much attention in the mornings and he just snacks all day, but no one is sticking out immediately.]

Miss Everett and Mochizuki-san.

Everett and Mochizuki... uh...

[HANG ON HE DOESN'T KNOW THEIR LAST NAMES let him find his stupid ID thing and look them up--]

Oh, Merdiana and Ryoji-- really?

[He glances up at Tsukiyama curiously.]

I don't remember seeing them eating or... not eating or anything, but I guess I haven't been keeping a close eye on that. What makes you think they're ghouls?

Silver-kun has told me that Mochizuki-san sleeps very little, and more noticeably he doesn't eat. He'll do it when he's reminded or told to, but otherwise he doesn't seem to need to. Lately he's taken to locking himself in his room for long periods of time - and perhaps more telling, he's been locking Silver-kun out.

Miss Everett, on the other hand...she smells similar to someone I know - someone who's one of us, but his body has been modified. I think she may have experienced the same, she's mentioned doctors and medical procedures...the fact that she seems to be from an earlier time is irrelevant, as ghouls have existed for centuries. It's not unreasonable to think she's one of ours as well. She's another that never eats, and she seems to be falling ill and having complications that she isn't willing to elaborate on.

Bluntly put, I think they're both starving and starting to feel the effects of it. I believe Mochizuki-san has been better off than Miss Everett, but I don't know how much that's saying.

Huh... Ryoji was helping me out yesterday morning and he seemed fine then. Do you think he could be...?

[Well, he shares a room with Silver, so maybe they're also doing the whole "eating your friend" thing. Hopefully with less insanity involved.]

Do you think one of them is going to make a move tonight then?

[He's very curious about what sort of modifications Tsukiyama's talking about, but this is slightly more important.]

...I don't know. Miss Everett didn't seem to want to linger on the upper floors past the announcement - I met with her tonight.

[...]

If I know about them, there's a chance they'll know about me; we're all on a time limit, and I don't know if they're the sort to try to make this into a territory dispute or not when they become starved out enough to become aggressive.

Oh man...

[Ryuunosuke runs a hand through his bangs.]

So... What do you want me to do? Assuming neither of them kill anyone tonight, that's going to make next week really difficult. I can try to stay in here if you think that'll help.

...Just be aware of them for now, and try to avoid being out after the announcements. If they decide to get into some sort of dispute with me, I can handle it.

[...But he likes being out after the nighttime announcement...]

Alright. I won't put myself at risk. I promised.

[He's perfectly fine with not risking his neck. Or any of his other body parts.]

But hey... if you think you're in over your head...

[Tsukiyama's too proud to admit something like that though, right?]

Look just... don't get hurt to the point where you can't heal yourself, alright? I don't mind doing what I can to help, but people are going to start asking questions if I lose a limb or something.

[ryuunosuke]

...You remember the first motive we received, don't you? I showed you what I was given.

I survived that.

[...!!!!!!!]

Wait... wait, that one where your arm and your head were-- You survived that? You're sure?

[He moves to get up, but he's a bit too dizzy to manage that and resettles in the chair instead.]

You haven't said very much about your memories so I didn't realize... But if you can heal from that then there really shouldn't be anything to worry about, right?

[Ryuunosuke actually looks really hopeful at that.]

Yes and no - I imagine you also recall what the building I was in looked like.

[...You know, the thing that used to be the interior of a church.]

That's what happens when ghouls fight; that was the work of maybe two others, along with myself - I think I was fighting both of them at once and was eventually overpowered.

So if we decide to fight here...well, it's going to be obvious. It'll likely be brutal but over reasonably quickly - I have no doubt that I can subdue Miss Everett, but I'm not sure about Mochizuki-san. If what I suspect about him is correct, his kagune is likely one that's strong against mine - if that's the case, it's a matter of whether I outrank him or not in terms of strength, which I obviously won't know until we're already fighting.

Oh... yeah, it looked pretty bad.

[If they fight anywhere in the hotel, it's going to destroy something. That destruction of property rule is worrying, but Tsukiyama's said something that's even more concerning.]

Do you think you'll be okay?

[Ryuunosuke has no idea how this is going to go. Tsukiyama's told him a good amount about ghouls (he thinks, at least) but he has no idea how strong Tsukiyama actually is in comparison to other ghouls. With a weapon like that he certainly looks like he'd be skilled in a fight, but that motive picture is worrying.

Meridiana obviously isn't anyone to worry about, at least not for someone like Tsukiyama. Ryoji is a wildcard and one Ryuunosuke can't even attempt to figure out.]

[Hmm.]

It would be strategically...prudent, for Mochizuki-san and I to handle Miss Everett first, assuming what I suspect about her kagune is correct - ah, here...

[Just...let him get that motive photograph out of his inside pocket, because he...carries that with him as though that's not creepy at all. He'll be bringing it over, pointing out some of those dark shrapnel shards that have torn into the pews once the photo is in Ryuunosuke's line of sight.]

This is something that acquaintance of mine does - her kagune is designed to create projectiles. The kagune itself emerges from just above the shoulder, higher up than mine; they often resemble wings of some sort, but not always. They're efficient and very fast-moving, but they run out of energy quickly - designed to get their job done and then that's the end of it.

It makes the most sense to me that that's the sort of thing Miss Everett can do; I don't think she can sustain anything else. But the projectiles would make her a bit of a nuisance to deal with...

[...Anyway.]

I think she'll be handled with no difficulty. I don't know about Mochizuki-san, however. He...may pose a problem.

[It's not really answering the question any, but at the very least it's providing some sort of vague idea of what this might end up looking like.]

I'd give it maybe fifteen minutes at the longest - again, brutal, but fast.

[Wings, huh? That sounds kind of pretty too. Ryuunosuke takes a moment to try to imagine what the sitting room would look like once Meridiana is done with it. Even if her projectiles look nothing like the ones in Tsukiyama's picture, it's still going to be awful.

But assuming she won't be too much of a threat, there's still Ryoji.]

How much of a problem?

[He's not intentionally hiding his eyes, but his bangs are in the way while he studies the photograph. Ryuunosuke's voice is strangely blank, as is his expression.

Tsukiyama won't die to this. Tsukiyama can't die to this.]

Enough of a problem for me to mention it as possibly being one.

[He's aware that Ryuunosuke is likely getting upset, but at the same time, he did say last night that he wants to know about potential issues.]

Again, it's going to come down to a matter of strength. I'm used to sparring against someone stronger than I am; if Mochizuki-san isn't, there won't be an issue.

[...Well when you put it like that, he really did ask for this... Some part of him is pleased that Tsukiyama is actually talking about it, but...]

Is there anything I can do?

[He knows there isn't. Fighting a ghoul is out of the question, even if he did know how to fight. Getting involved at all is impossible. He'll be killed instantly.]

I... I really hope nothing happens. I don't want... I don't want you to get hurt.

...It's in our best interests to not move at all, much less against each other. We're going to destroy property if we fight, and we're still going to have to stand trial after being outed to everyone else. It won't end well.

But there's also a chance that one of us will decide we won't care, and that may set the others off. It's possible nothing will happen, it's possible we may have a bloodbath on our hands within the next week.

[What am I going to do if something happens to you? How am I supposed to keep going when there's probably nothing for me back home and you're the one person I care about? What do I do if I can't help you? What do I do if you're executed? What if--]

...Yeah.

[Ryuunosuke stands, slowly and awkwardly and once he's sure he's not going to tip over he walks forward and reaches out like he's going to touch Tsukiyama's hand, only to stop himself at the last moment. He's not trying to make eye contact, but he's not hiding his eyes either.]

Try to stay safe, alright?

[He can't ask for anything more.]

[Tsukiyama's gaze darts down to where Ryuunosuke seemed tempted to touch him only to draw up short; he isn't...entirely sure what to think about that but it's obvious that it strikes him strangely, and he finds himself drawing back - it's not an intentional movement at all, and he's suddenly aware that it's probably not helping anything right now, but he realizes well after the point where he can stop himself from doing it.]

Of course I will. I have promises to keep, don't I?

[That kind of hurts. ...No, there's not "kind of" about it. That hurts. Tsukiyama doesn't usually move away from him like that and Ryuunosuke's not sure if he did something wrong.]

Yeah. I'll never forgive you if you don't keep them.

[He's sort of smiling, but the expression isn't very genuine. Ryuunosuke doesn't even know what's wrong. His emotions are just doing something weird, it'll be over with soon enough and things will go back to normal. He's beginning to wish he'd never started having feelings in the first place when they keep malfunctioning like this.]

...You're not going out again tonight, right?

Of course not.

[He does smile a bit then, reaching out to run a hand through Ryuunosuke's hair.]

I'm going to be staying here with you.

Good. Good.

[He's so relieved to hear that and he leans into Tsukiyama's touch immediately.]

I'd be kinda mad if you ditched me while I'm in pain, you know!

[The words are very light though and he's obviously joking. He doesn't blame Tsukiyama for that at all.]

[He seems pleased with the reaction at least, the smile edging decidedly closer to genuine.]

I'm going to be all right, you know.

[His words are light while he plays with Ryuunosuke's hair a bit more, but they're entirely genuine.]

I'll make sure of it, no matter what happens; I have you to come back to, after all.

[O-Oh. It was less personal when Tsukiyama was just talking about promises in general, but Ryuunosuke is very happy with his words. He's turning pink, of course.]

Yeah! You wouldn't want to leave me alone, right?

[It's not really a question and he doesn't dwell on it.]

I'll wait for you, of course. I wouldn't dare do anything to risk my life. You'd probably be pretty mad at me for doing something that dumb.

[Some part of him vaguely wonders what it would feel like to be bitten by Meridiana or Ryoji--

He ignores it. There's no point in thinking about it. Ryuunosuke leans into Tsukiyama's touch for a moment before reaching out to grab his shirt. He's never been that big on physical affection, but there's something very different about this and even if it's something dumb like this, he wants it.]

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